Surprisenly Energetic : Monday, Dec. 02, 2002 @ 3:48 pm

Sleep abandoned me last night. Seriously. I had one of those nights where you lay in bed staring into the dark for three hours, fall asleep. Wake up an hour later. Stare into the dark for an hour. Fall asleep. Wake up an hour later. Endless cycle that doesn't give you the sleep you need. However, I managed to survive well enough through the day. Though I will say that by lunchtime I was so tired I was actually shaking. That can't be a good thing.
There's a guy (possible friend?) whose name I can not remember because first of all he never really introduced himself... I've heard someone call him by his name (begins with an A), but I can't remember how to pronounce it. I'm also, as many people can tell you... horrible with names. It's not just in life either. I can't for the life of me remember names of book charrecters. Someone will be talking about a book I just spouted the joys of and I just simply won't remember the names of the charrecters (hmm am I spelling that right?) unless I read the book again.... wait where was I? Oh yea, the guy... he's my fellow philosipher at lunch. A junior, transfer student from India. Great guy, great personality. He's gay, but not that obvious gay. Like I didn't really pick up on it until recently. Not that I was paying much attention to it. Frankly, my gaydar is more fine tuned for females, for obvious reasons. Well yes, once I figure out his name I'm sure we could be great friends.
There's other people too... I'm actually having people saying HI to me in the hallways (and some of these people, I can remember their names!). Yea so it's all good. I'm settling in nicely. Really. Just took a rough first month.

The party I wanted to go to? Well supposedly it sucked and I should be glad I didn't go to it. Why did it suck? Well, it was fine until like one/two in the morning, when some uninvited ass holes showed up and basicly trashed Stephanie's house. Alana was telling her story of the weekend and when I asked her what else she was on besides alchoal she replies curtly "acid". Well yea, that's what I was thinking but her tone was wayyy too curt. I felt like saying keep in mind, I'm from the North. Yea, they had acid but a- none of my friends really did it b- from what I gathered, it was probably not the easiest drug to get in Houlton. Anyways. Yea, so she had a bad acid trip, thought she was in hell, the clock kept on laughing at her, and she had to go to work still fucked up.
Yea... see... this is why I'm not a big partier...

I'm quite irritated at my body (ie myself) right now. You know those fresh scars I rambled on about a few entries ago? Yea well I've forgotten how completely irritating it is to have to hide them. I give it another two weeks before I can go back to wearing short sleeves gggrrr.
Another irritation involving my body - my boobs. WTF is with boobs? I mean, yea breasts are wonderful and hmmmm yea well they just are. I just don't like mine. -squishes hers flat- They're too fucking pointy. CONES. I have fucking CONE BOOBS. I want nice shaped boobs. Normal shaped boobs.

Being awake all night gives you a lot of time to think. It really does. However, thoughts jumbled all together do not last until the next evening, when I could write them down and make sense of them all. Too bad. So sad. Moving on.

Actually. What am I supposed to move on to
/A

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